Modern media is in many ways helpful; an extra source of current events, a way to keep in touch with friends and loved ones, and a daily dose of our favorite celebrities. But in many ways, it is one of the most toxic parts of my everyday life. Media, lately, at least has done an outstanding job of promoting the “perfect woman.” What I mean by that is this: on my feed every day, no matter what platform, I see different ways of promoting diet culture. Telling women how to walk, talk, eat, dress, etc. In addition, I have never seen more romanticism of eating disorders and unhealthy eating habits than I have in the past few months. I see comments on women’s posts, from other women; comments such as “Oh, I didn’t want to eat today anyway,” or, “If only I looked like that.”

 

     This concept that’s been thrown around, deemed “Thinspo,” is what motivates young girls to work out or not eat when they see a skinny, “ideal” body type on their newsfeed. It is inherently fatphobic, yet when a “fat” girl demonstrates self-love and confidence, it’s either “how everyone should look,” or she should go work-out to lose a few pounds. There is no winning, and ideally there shouldn’t have to be. It is a form of brainwashing; media standards should not define our worth as women, but reality is harsh, and it happens.

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     I can easily say that my everyday life is affected by diet culture, and the media’s portrayal of women’s bodies, as if that is the only important aspect of our lives. With platforms such as Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, TikTok, etc., it has become extremely difficult to avoid these topics, as I come across different posts every single day. Because these subjects are so hard to avoid, it has been ingrained in my mind to think as the media does. I have unintentionally trained myself to think, “Oh, I shouldn’t eat that because it’s not healthy,” or I look in the mirror and think about how I don’t look as good as the next girl that I find scrolling through my newsfeed. There is no "good" or "bad" food. There is just food, and we need food to fuel our bodies. Demonizing foods is just one of the many aspects of diet culture.

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     There are many different ways to struggle with body image, and mine is merely one of them. Women, men, and everyone in between all have different perceptions of how each one of us should look. I would bet that a very large percentage of the women that have “ideal” body types still have insecurities about their bodies. It is hard to live in a society like ours today and avoid all of the negativity surrounding the body and self-image, and it feels crazy to say that I feel as if I will only be able to fully love myself if I look a certain way. 

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     I wanted to use this series as a way to dictate some thoughts that run through my mind on an almost everyday basis. Some days, I find, are easier than others to ignore the intrusive, disordered thoughts that cross my mind. On certain days, I can find myself defying these thoughts. I will tell myself, “Not today. Today I will be kind to myself and my body.” But with easy days come difficult days, and on the difficult days it’s sometimes hard to bring myself to eat or even get out of bed. Every day, I tell myself to exercise and to work out, but it is almost never to be healthy. It is so I can look how I think I should look, which is defined by modern media’s standards. And this, I can guarantee, is something that I am not alone in experiencing.

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      I hope that through each photo, I can at least spark a thought, or maybe a conversation about how we should both be kinder to each other and ourselves and rise above this media-instilled hatred. I am so much more than how I look, and I want people to know they are not alone in their thoughts. How I look is the least interesting thing about me. It is so easy to become caught up in the thoughts we have about our bodies and ourselves, but I think it is time we start trying the seemingly difficult route and be kind to ourselves.